1.) Shooting stars should not be on your underwear even in an ironic hipster way after the age of 17
2.)You end up with several pairs of black panties in your 5 for $26 deal because terms like "prom queen" and "head cheerleader" across your butt have not been age appropriate in more than 5 years
3.)You want to lecture the thirteen year old picking out thongs next to you
5.) You are buying them with a credit card and earned money from your full-time job and it doesn't involve babysitting your neighbor
Its sad at the prime age of 25 I am getting too old for things in my dresser but I hope you get a kick out of this!